Redemption (Sort of)

It's okay to like Twilight if you are 12... maybe 15 if nobody wants to kiss you, so you sneak off to "practice" with your slow cousin. But grown ass women digging this movie just creeps me out. First: the books are terrible. Really. Many little girls actually protested how lousy the last one in particular was and returned their books for a refund in a very smart act of protest against giving money to ______. Why do I write ______? Well, research her social values and that will become clear. No easy hits on this blog. Anyway, the movies (against the cosmic odds) are even worse. And Kristen Stewart is apparently competing for the Golden Douchie with such wonderful talents as clicking her tongue every three words (both in and out of movies), not realizing that she doesn't qualify for "assassination" (really, if someone goes there, it's at best a mercy killing), and coming across like a royal biatch on Letterman. You don't know what a "woof" is? Remember high school?

Alas, there is some redeeming value coming to the Twilight thing. The interactive 8-bit video! When it's time to choose your action, click on it, and the continuation video will open up in a new window. Trust me, it's way better than the movie and probably has higher production values.



As always, remember: