Saturday, May 17, 2008

The Long Butt of the Law

chp called mp and asked to meet for coffee. mp immediately flahed back to a conversation she'd had with pimptress only a few weeks before.

PIMPTRESS: you're still fucking firegirl?
MP: uh...
PIMPTRESS: chp is going to kill you. really. the woman carries a gun. she is going to shoot you dead.

mp told chp that she was really booked and had to be at work early since it's finals week. everyone that knows mp knows that she has various "pimpy's"-- the original pimpy's, pimpy jr's, pimpy light, mc pimpy's, work pimpy's, and old lady pimpy's-- where there's a barrista that's in her 60's that loves her some mp. when she sees mp, she gives her a spank, a wink, and a free venti drip.

hey, it's an arrangement that works for them both....

chp, of course, showed up at mp's "office" and was waiting when mp strolled in for her morning drip and smack on the ass from the old lady barrista. in her head, mp heard pimptress' voice, "she gonna shoot you dead. ha-ha." firegirl dumped chp and told her it was because chp was too skinny and high maintenance. firegirl apparently lost it and told chp that she didn't know what her problem was-- it was impossible to have a stick up her ass, because the stick would be wider.

chp was devastated, and mp was appalled by firegirl's personal attack. of course, this totally cleared up what firegirl sees in mp... i digress.

chp spent 15 minutes moaning and fishing for compliments. eventually, mp told her she was curvy, sexy and wonderful. well...
she is sexy.

when chp asked about her "stick ass," mp toed around the subject, then finally looked into those big gray eyes and said, "she's crazy. it's practically a ghetto booty." mp is the worst liar in the world, but chp was happy. when they got in line for refills, mp looked at chp from behind and started thinking about going into acting.